Monday, October 11, 2010

Help Wanted

Nice, but tired, middle-aged couple, seeks wife for assistance with projects of a disctinctly domestic nature.

Candidate should be strong, healthy and patient. Additionally, the following skills would be a plus:

Mind-reading
Plumbing and electrical, woodworking and tile know-how
Masters in Education, preferably Math/Science and/or Japanese
Commercial drivers license, P, N or S endorsement (passenger, bus, tank)
Cordon-bleue classical french cuisine training
Seamstress
Commercial cleaning license with hazmat endorsement
K-9 obedience trainer
Travel agent, meeting planner
Debate skills
MD
JD
CPA
MBA
PhD Philosphy

Applicant must not require vacations or more than 4 hours of sleep per night and should expect to be on call 24/7/365.

Room and board provided, no salary. Benefits include free use of netflix membership and (after preparing them for us) meals shared with positively delightful family.

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